The Man

So, I’ve noticed that my blog posts haven’t been as funny as they could be recently. This was rather disheartening. Maybe I’d lost my touch (more likely I never had one). Maybe I had finally ran out of ideas. Whatever the cause I decided I had to get back to my inner-artist. So I wrote a brand new story. A story greater than all my other stories. A story that will leave people guessing. A story unlike any other. And so, with out further adieu, my great new masterpiece:

The Man

There once was a man. And then he died.

It really speaks to you doesn’t it.

Armadillo of Legends: Defender of Stuffed Animals

The Armadillo of Legends: Defender of Stuffed Animals

As the Armadillo left the desert he was greeted with the ominous smell of smoke. Surveying the horizon he quickly saw the origin of the smoke. The smoke billowed and curled in a giant column that snaked down to a small village in the distance.

Though he had promised to save the princess the noble nature of the Armadillo would not allow him to pass such wrongs without at least seeing if he could help. Moreover, since huge destruction and  fires are the token of the Rainbow Dragon, perhaps he could kill two birds with one stone.

As he arrived on the scene he saw that the villagers had already put out most of the immediate fire but it continued to spread with amazing strength and speed into the distance.

Hurriedly the Armadillo went to one of the villagers who gave him a brief detail of what had happened. Apparently most of them had been working in the fields so they did not entirely know what had happened. They did however know that before the fire had started they saw two shadows fly by. They couldn’t tell what they were, but they knew that the second had brought the fire.

The Armadillo waited to hear no more. If this was his arch-nemesis many more people would be in danger. As he grew near to the source of the still spreading fire he slowed down a little to prepare himself for battle. He noticed that while two shadows flew and shot fire they did so with little noise, but the vile dragon generally fought while challenging with ear deafening roars.

The Armadillo had little time to ponder this, as he quickly saw his chance to strike. Crouching behind a large rock, he saw the shadow growing closer. Suddenly he leapt in front of it sword and shield in hand poised for action. What landed in front of him were three perspicuous figures. A fox, a bear, and a racoon: The Barons of Evil.

Reorganizing

So as it turns out Yesterday was far more interesting than I thought it would be. We moved around a BUNCH of comic book boxes and other band stuff, moving them all into the studio. It does look a little disorganized, but it’s far better than all those good comics and stuff getting ruined in the garage. Besides I think it makes it look more soundroomy. We also hung up a cool new stained glass ornament in the front window. It looks pretty neat if you ask me.

Peter Piper

So, I was thinking about the tongue twister Peter Piper. The first line is, “Peter Piper picked a peck of pickled peppers.” Now if you think about it, pickling is a process that you do after you have picked the plant. So what plant does Peter Piper have that it can grow already pickled peppers. Think about that for awhile.

The Armadillo of Legends: Defender of Stuffed Animals

As the Armadillo turned and walked away from his aged advisor, a passerby, confused by the Armadillo’s outlandish garb asked the old bunny, “Who was that Armadillo? Where did he come from?”.

“Why, said MyBunny, how could you not know? That is the Armadillo of Legends! He comes from a village far away, and his tale is not a happy one.

He used to live quite happily in his own village. They had food, water, and shelter.  They were overall a prosperous town and more importantly a joyous one. They had the sun shine by day and the moonglow by night, the birds sang ceaselessly while the flowers bloomed. Sadly, nothing lasts forever. Eventually, tales of their good fortune spread reaching the ears of those who are most greedy, one of these was the dreaded Rainbow Dragon.

The Rainbow Dragon, bloated with greed, ever hungry for gold and power, descended on the town with all his flame and fury leaving nothing left, but a the charred remains of this once happy village.

Now the Armadillo wanders in search of this flaming terror, righting wrongs as he comes upon them, growing ever stronger and more experienced.Gaining power and wisdom until he can finally confront and vanquish his foe.

That is the tale of the Armadillo of Legends”.

“Wait, so everyone in his village just died?”

“No! Hearing that the Rainbow Dragon was coming, they packed their stuff and moved. They live in a nearby village”

“So how do you know all this?” the passerby quizzically queried.

“Looked it up on the internet. I mean! Because I’m so wise and all that stuff…”

Extra, Extra, Read All About It

Polar Bear is awesome!!! So is Doggy!!! Tiny Polar Bear says Hi!!! Polar Bear likes writing. Umm… Anyone else wan’ to say something? What. I know you’ll take over the world, you say that a lot. What do mean Elephant? You think this is a waste of time? Seriosly though anyone else want to say somthing? No? Oh, you think I shold stop writing everythang I say? Okay makes sense. I’ll stop writting now…I did stop, oh, oh no wait I didn’t. I’m going to…right now…right now. Bye evryone out there.

-Polar Bear

A New Department

Today the Longbow News Service would like to welcome our new journalist department. Polar Bear: main writer. Doggy: editor/writer. Elephant: department manger. Baron Fox: world conqueror. Tiny Polar Bear (aka. Steel): cuddly mascot. When asked about his new position Polar Bear had this to say: “Writing isn’t so hard… Spelling words good is half the battle”.

Baron Fox had a slightly different opinion: “I WILL RULE THE COSMOS WITH AN IRON FIST!”.

Tiny Polar Bear was just happy to be there: “Yay, now I have a real job.”

Suffice to say they are all very happy to help. Their first article will come out tomorrow.

Easter Eggs

This year we had a fairly easy time finding our Easter eggs. Because we ate them for dinner on Good Friday! Luckily I took some pictures of them before my siblings and I devoured them. We also had some eggs that had special designs on them. Like this polka dot egg. And this egg.We managed to make the designs on the eggs because Anne had the wonderful idea of dipping a Q-tip in the dye and then spreading it on the egg.

The Tale of Mirrors and Shadows

A few days ago Veronica wrote a story called,

The Tale of Mirrors and Shadows

This is the (not) true tale of how Mirrors and Shadows came to be. Once upon a time, there was nothing but clear glass in which lived the Mirror-people. Then, humans began appearing which looked exactly like the Mirror-people. Soon, the Mirror-people could no longer tell which was a human and which was one of their own. A conflict rose between them. Thus began the Mirror-war. The Mirror-war lasted 7 days and 7 nights without stopping for food. And when the dust had cleared, there were about as many humans as there were Mirror-people. When you look in the mirror, or see your shadow, you are really seeing your Mirror-being. Only light and mirrors show them up. The End.

That’s exactly how she wrote it, I didn’t change a word. I do wonder a little why your shadow, and your reflection are both your Mirror-being, but it really doesn’t matter.

Nicholas’ Superpower

For as long as I can remember Nicholas has been really good at predicting movie lines. No really, I remember being really little and we were watching the animated “Sleeping Beauty”, and the narrator said, “And they called her Aurora”. Nicholas, who had been studying Latin at the time, said, “They named her after the dawn?!”. Right after the narrator said, as if answering Nicholas, “Yes, they named her after the dawn”. And just last night we were watching a movie and Nicholas predicted EXACTLY what they were going to say. I think this must be his superpower. It’s not a very useful power, but it’s still a superpower.