Mr. Squirrel

Today I saw Mr. Squirrel taking a quiet repose on the table in the park.You’d think if the squirrel had any brains it would be more afraid of the table, since that is where we eat other animals. Unfortunately for the squirrel it is sadly lacking in intellect.

Big, Red, Hairy Ant

So the other day while Mom was out, I had to prepare lunch for when she got home. However I wasn’t entirely sure about the recipe so I called Mom to ask her about it. After explaining the recipe, she told me she had a present for me. It was a new bug! Two new bugs! One was a dragonfly (I already have a couple of dragonflies so it’s not quite as exciting), the other was a big, red,¬†hairy ant. At least I think it’s an ant. I’m not really sure. I do know it’s fairly strong however. One day while I was standing near where I store the bugs I heard a weird sound, a kinda scratchy sound. I looked around to see what it was, maybe something in the laundry room or the garage, but no. It was the ant scratching the bag.

Baby Lizard

So while I was weeding the other day Robert was… Also weeding. Only instead of a nasty toad, Robert found a lizard nest. One of the ways you can tell that something is a lizards egg is that, for one thing it will be egg shaped, and the other is that a lizard egg is kinda soft and leathery. I didn’t always know what a lizard’s egg felt like. In fact, I found one once before, and I just thought it was a weird rock. So I tried to squish it. Fortunately the lizard inside the egg wasn’t hurt, it just came flying out of the shell looking really confused, then ran away. We saw one of the eggs hatch (without being forcefully ejected) this little black lizard. I wonder if maybe all baby lizards are black, because both the newly hatched lizards I saw were. I don’t know though, it might just be a coincidence.

Toads Are Nasty!!!

Yesterday, while I was pulling weeds by the pool enclosure, I noticed this toad buried in the dirt. It might have buried itself to avoid the heat, or it might have buried itself to avoid predators. Either way it blended in very well and I never would have noticed it if I had not seen it breathing. Sorry toad most rocks don’t breath. It was so dedicated to not being caught it let an ant crawl over its eye without moving. I however, had already seen it and pulled it out of the dirt. At this point, the toad did one of few things a toad can do in defense of its life. Leaping forwards it sprayed pee (literally) a foot behind itself. IT TRIED TO PEE ON ME. Yeah that’s right, toads are nasty little animals.

Woodpeckers

Today while I was mowing the lawn I saw two woodpeckers climbing up a tree. Not overly amazing, but it is rare to see two woodpeckers in the same tree. Did you know, that some woodpecker’s tongues wrap around their skull, to cushion their brain while are pecking for bugs? No wonder they can drill into wood so easily.

A Joke

Recently I heard a rather amusing joke. Like most jokes however it probably won’t be as funny if you are reading it, but maybe you can tell it to a friend or something. Anyways, a man and a giraffe walk into a bar. After a while the giraffe passes out and falls on the flour. Then, as the man gets up to leave the bartender says, “Hey, you can’t leave that lying there.” So the man says, “It isn’t a lion it’s a giraffe.”

(Cue laugh track)

Dragon-Fly Lapel

Today while Mom and Nicholas were at the grocery store Nicholas get me a new bug. Most people buy food at a grocery store, but Nicholas got me a bug. Isn’t that nice! What happened was, as they were going through the checkout, the dragon-fly flew into one of the balloons filled with helium. It must have gotten dazed or something because it fell onto Nicholas’ lapel and just sat there as if it was his lapel pin. Knowing I would appreciate a new bug Nicholas grabbed it and brought it home.

The Lawn

So today we weeded and mowed the lawn. It’s not very interesting but it’s what we did today. I also almost caught a butterfly for my bug collection, but it got away. Butterflies are REALLY hard to catch. Recently though I did get this beetle. I think the design on its back is supposed to look like a leech.

Plant or Parasite!

Recently I found some strange new plant species growing in the park. I am not sure what it is yet, but I am currently gathering data on it to try to ascertain it’s origin. It is a yellowish color, and has rigid, somewhat triangular shape. It’s possible it is the fruiting body of the plant, however I am afraid it might be a fungal parasite. If anyone one has any idea what this thing might be, please contact me immediately! I would definitely not want this unsightly plant spreading.

Giant Grasshopper!

I was going through some old photos and I found these pictures. I figured the best way to present them would be as a short story (a very short story). Oh no! It’s the attack of the giant grasshopper! The swat men fought bravely, but it was hopeless.Finally, the Lego Ninja Force showed up and saved the day.Or not.